where shall i begin with?
alot of thoughts running in my mind
eyes are getting watery too
sigh
lots of things are happening
happening real fast that i dunno how to get into it
Lord
maybe this is what You have for me
but it is really getting tough
to me
it seems like losing my friends
but i dun wish that i will be the one holding them back in this church
i know i have not been a good friend
i have not telling them the things that i have been thinking
thinking for quite a long time on my mind
i just cant get them out of my mouth i guess
Lord
please
get all these feelings out of me
for You are my help in all difficulties
surround me with Your angels
Lord
You are my strength
strengthen me please
as i tap strength from You
to someone:
i dunno what happen that makes us totally like strangers now
and
to say the truth i hate that feeling
i hate it alot alot
i seem to be invisible in ur eyes
and its not the first time
why?
we use to be so close
and
what happened?
i know i have no power in staying u back now
i can just say
that i am letting go
may u find better friends that may lead u well
i pray that God will bless u in ur studies
Lord
what am i suppose to do?
i seem so aimlessly now
i feel so alone
why must everything happen at the same time?
why is it everytime my happiness is followed by such things
maybe i asked for it myself'
i just have to say
everyone is not perfect
thats why we are all together in a church learning
maybe i shldn't be bothered by how others look at me
we are all learning
so what if they judge me?
i know they are imperfect too and they are not in any position to judge
okay
i guess this is what God wanna plan for me
moulding me to be patient
love is patient
isn't it?
i will continue staying in this church
though ppl that i know are leaving
and they are close ones to me
those that i wished they would never leave and we can walk this out together
seeing ppl leaving church
doesn't means i have to too
isn't it when u see ppl leaving, shldn't i do more things so that others wouldn't leave?
i dunno
but i know i can't do it alone
but with God
i can do all things in Him
LORD
I HOPE MY DECISION ISN'T WRONG
i just want to do things that pleases You
"what can i give to You my Lord?
to make it worth what You went through?
i only have my heart to give,
and every moment that i have to live.
i'll give it all to You my Lord,
if thats the only way to show my love.
i'll live each day for You.
Worship at Your throne, i want to show You.
Just how much You mean to me, my Lord."
You really really really mean alot to me. really.