before you read this post
i have a request
if after reading this post
no matter whether you are concern or just wanna be a busybody
PLEASE just keep it to yourself
i don't need any breakfast, brunch, lunch, tea break. dinner, supper and any other treat
if you feel that you can't do it
please just stop reading here
RIGHT HERE





































have been thinking quite alot these few days.
i mean recently
haha
hmm
but actually i don't really have a idea what i am thinking about
i just feel like..
maybe i am backsliding?
haha
don't know
i am like spending each of my day
wanting to know Him more
but
at the same time thinking negative things abt myself
i think all the things i have been thinking abt are all the stuff that are downgrading myself?
maybe all the things i do in others eyes actually means that too?
seriously don't know
sometimes, out of the blue
there will be a sudden sad feeling that completely engulfs me?
seriously
really kind of tired of these kind of life
maybe
just maybe if everything didn't happen would be nice?
just a low profile life is maybe what i prefer now
but
all those are jus maybe
truthfully
i enjoyed every moment with him
but
there will just be some time that i will think of
those ppl that i hurt
and it just makes me more feel like ------- ------.
feel like going -------.
sometimes, i just wonder if there is anyone who ever know how i feel
that time
one friend shared with me
don't care abt what other see of me
but
thats really difficult
and now
i really ----- going to ------.
i don't know how i am suppose to react when i --- --- ------
everybody thinks its my fault
and
everybody kind of..
---- her?
even my own ------ and ------ thinks of that too
tired of this kind of life
God, what am i am suppose to do
i am messing up with my own life
and i don't want this to happen
like the lyrics


"When you don't want to face another day
Seems like your life's one big mistake
Failures from your former self chase you
Listen close so you know what to do

You may not see it
and you may not feel it
But I'm holding you tightly
Your spirit is near Me
Hold on, hold on
It will not be long 'til it's all over
Child, hold on, hold on
Lay your weary head upon My shoulder

The rain is beating down so faithfully
But My love is more faithful, you will see
The winds will show no mercy for your face
But your heart is safe, secure inside My grace"

Hold on, hold on, hold on Hold on, hold on, no it won’t be too long

i really don't know how to face another day
i feel so lost when i go to ------
ppl say just forget abt what happen
------ doesn't blame you
but
who knows?
who will not blame ------- person for doing ----
if me,
i would also be
i know i would not be so da fang as the person
the more the person say its alright the more ------ i feel
deep down in me

God
how?
HOW??
i am --------- for an answer

i don't want to fall down
i want to hold on to you
please hold on to me tightly and my heart is secure in You
cause i really don't know how long i can hang on any further...



Hold on, hold on, hold onHold on, hold on, no it won’t be too long